I sometimes feel like I’m the only twenty-one-year-old in Cork who doesn’t drink coffee. It’s not that I have anything against coffee. I understand why millions of people love it, whether it’s the ritual, the taste, or simply the boost that gets them through the day. But as someone who doesn’t drink it, I’ve realised something surprising, life these days revolves around coffee.
Friendships begin over coffee. Study sessions happen over coffee. Meetings, first dates, catch-ups and even job interviews seem to start with, “Do you want a coffee?”
To be honest, my rejection of the beans was not entirely by choice. I don’t tend to react to caffeine very well. I can recall one experience in school, where my friends and I grabbed some coffee on our lunch break. What proceeded was the worst biology lesson in my entire life. I felt as though my heart was beating so aggressively I could feel it crashing into the inside of my skin with every beat. My hands were shaking beyond control, and I could barely form a sentence. If I didn’t know any better I would have assumed I had accidentally ingested an illicit drug. It took hours for the effects to wear off, and left me with indelible scars.
Stupidly, I decided to test the waters for a second time, the day I was tasked with moving out of my childhood home. I had 19 years of clutter and memorabilia to sort through when it occurred to me to drink the spurious energy drink I had lying around. I had never tried one before, and drinking it meant there was one less thing to pack. My parents found me crying in a heap thinking I was having a heart attack. From then on I have steered clear.
The issue is not the coffee itself. It’s the fact that if you don’t drink it, you can sometimes feel like you’ve accidentally opted out of a social club you never meant to leave. While studying in UCC I noticed how every day seems to begin and end in a coffee shop. It is the number one way to make friends, forge connections and even meet with lecturers. It is very awkward when somebody invites you for coffee, and even though you willingly accept, you do not have a coffee-type beverage when the date rolls around. There’s a certain, I can’t believe you let me invite you here, look in their eyes. It feels like I’m giving them a silent rejection, a subtle message that says I don’t condone your lifestyle. There are only so many hot chocolates us naysayers can drink before we are fed up with the non-caffeinated options. Perhaps this doesn’t bother everyone but as a coeliac, I find that my coffee shop options are doubly limited. I can’t alleviate my hot drink guilt with a nice pastry. I also feel an element of guilt toward the cafés, despite being the one not catered toward, I feel bad taking up space in their establishment.
There are of course monetary benefits that have emerged from this endeavour. Based on some estimates from my friends, I have saved a cool €1800 in the last year alone. People spend 10-20 on coffee every week, leaving me feeling smug as can be.
I am also an excellent sleeper, averaging nine or ten hours every night. Sometimes I’ll even have a nap in the afternoon. As a child I was never allowed to stay up past 8pm. Nowadays lights out is always 10pm. The Goldilocks bedtime, 10pm isn’t too early or too late. I am aware this bedtime is very helpful in avoiding the need for caffeine. I can also see how somebody could get themselves trapped in a cycle, by leaning on caffeine for support throughout the day, and locking themselves out of an early bedtime.
Interestingly, my mother decided to give up caffeine last January. She described her relationship with coffee as a “30 year love affair”. She was never a huge coffee drinker, no more than two cups a day, and never after 2pm. Slowly but surely she began to wean herself, switching one cup to decaf, then both, and ultimately transitioning to peppermint tea. Symptom-wise she had headaches for the first two weeks, and no more after that. Once she made the switch from decaf coffee, to herbal tea, she could not stop falling asleep. On couches, in restaurants, and in the cinema. After another two weeks, her body adjusted, and she had no more symptoms. Now she finds herself sleeping for longer stretches at night, and having more restorative sleep. She has also subjected herself to having the awkward conversation when out and about, and carries a peppermint teabag everywhere she goes.
I’m not against anybody enjoying a cup of coffee or tea, but if I were to tempt people into slowing down their caffeine intake I would start slowly. Have one less cup a day, switch your last cup to decaf, or try not to have any coffee after 2pm. An interesting study from the NIH tells us it can take our bodies up to nine hours to clear half the caffeine from our systems. If cutting out your caffeine fix is not realistic, maybe try to upgrade your bedtime routines to improve the quality of sleep you do get. Having nighttime rituals helps the brain know when to produce melatonin and get ready for the night shift. Start small and see how your sleep changes.
On a parting note, if I could divulge any bit of wisdom on somebody who reads this article it would be this: after extensive research I can confirm that the only herbal teas worth trying are ginger and lemon, and berry, the rest taste like grass.
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